We must work with God in order to experience change
Perhaps you have noticed that God does a lot of the hard work of Step Six. But this does not mean that we are passive observers waiting for God to suck out our shortcomings like a shop vac.
Our undesirable habits hinder our ability to thrive. They show up as faults, weaknesses, failings, limitations, obsolete survival skills and more. They trigger guilt and shame. They embarrass us.
God wants us to live in peace, experience joy, purpose, meaning and satisfaction. It should be obvious that God is in agreement with us that these limitations need to go! But here’s the other thing about God that is super important to keep in mind.
He is not like our codependent mothers, willing to go to any lengths to help us avoid the consequences of our actions. He is not like our codependent fathers, who also go to any lengths to keep us from continuing down a self-destructive path. He is not like our siblings or friends who pick up our tabs or let us crash on their new sofas because they are afraid we will die out in the world under a bridge. Or, for those of us in less dramatic circumstances - all those people who are so afraid of hurting our feelings that they never rumble with us about the impact our limitations are having on them.
God is not willing to go to any lengths. He is only willing to go as far as we have invited him to travel with us. He will NOT come in and over run our unwillingness. He will not remove defects we are holding onto. God has boundaries. Our willingness is the key that unlocks the door that invites God in so that he can do his work of removal and restoration. God respects us enough to allow us to decide our readiness for transformation on our own timeframe.
The thoroughness of our willingness is our choice and our responsibility. There is no extra glory and bonus points for rushing; there is no shame in being honest about our ambivalence.
