The Price of Ignoring Your Pain

We add to our suffering when we try to ignore our pain. Our compulsions are ways we work to avoid noticing. Meditation helps us notice. If we practice it regularly, we learn that our pain will not kill us and even diminishes once we give it respectful attention.

Avoiding acknowledging our pain CAN kill us.

My “prayer” journals may have served the purpose of off-loading my angst. There is nothing wrong about that practice. When we admit our feelings we reduce resentment and soothe anxiety. Mediation helps us notice the things we are avoiding.

But it also increases conscious contact with God, which provides a light to our path.

Yesterday I stood from my meditation time and made my way to my iphone. I texted one of my children, “I need quality time with you.” I realized I had an incomplete amends to make. Today, we had a lovely lunch. My heart feels lighter. I am tempted to weigh myself (but will resist that urge).

Without my practice, I would not have had the space to notice my wrongdoing. I would not have had the awareness of how this pained me. But without my conscious contact with God, I doubt I would have known what to rise up and DO about it.

This is the gift of the Step 11 - a call to prayer and meditation, an invitation to draw near to God so that he might draw nearer to us. Go have a good sit, if you are so inclined!

Applying Step 11 to Your Everyday Life

In the 12-Step tradition, it is Step 11 that invites us to pray and meditate. “We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.”

My friends sometimes question the completeness of the eleventh step.

“My grandmother has cancer! Does Step 11 prevent me from praying for her?”

Imagine my speech bubble of sarcasm rising up to reply, “Really? You think there is someone on this planet or beyond that is asking you to pray LESS?” If I am in a good space, I do not say this. Here’s what I hope a more mature me might say:

The Step 11 is quite specific and is part of the 12-Step process; it is not intended to limit our prayers. It suggests (for the purpose of one’s recovery journey) that we keep two objectives in mind.

1. One goal is to improve our conscious contact with God (as we understand him).

2. We pray ONLY for the knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

Today, try that. No pleas or requests or petitions or instructions to God. Just this simple prayer:

God, here I am. I am ready to listen.

Amen.

A Prayer for You...

Does anyone ever COMPLETE this step? As we head toward discussions on the 12th - here is a prayer to affirm and support your journey:

Lord, we are here. I am finding out who I am and what I am living for. It is amazing to think that long before I became willing to walk this walk, before I got my hopes up, you had your eye on me. You had desires for me - to give me good gifts, to love me well, to support my life and fill it with meaning and purpose. Thank you. Amen.

What God Wants...

So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life - Your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life - And place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him… Fix your attention on God.

Romans 12:1-2 MSG

Is there a need for endless chatter about what God’s will for us is? I think not. We can sit quietly, contemplatively, secure in the knowledge that we have the meat of the message right here, right now. Next up? We ask how to personalize it in our own life. How do we stay close to God and receive his help? Who do we love in our everyday life? This is our choice.

What God Wants...

So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life - Your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life - And place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him… Fix your attention on God.

Romans 12:1-2 MSG

Is there a need for endless chatter about what God’s will for us is?

I think not. We can sit quietly, contemplatively, secure in the knowledge that we have the meat of the message right here, right now.

Next up? We ask how to personalize it in our own life. How do we stay close to God and receive his help?

Who do we love in our everyday life? This is our choice.