A Quiet Space of Strength

“Never assume that loud is strong and quiet is weak.”

Unknown

My granddaughter needs to get into gymnastics as soon as possible. We are running out of options at Meme’s house for her to express her athletic prowess and dramatic moves. Our TRX, end tables, exercise balls and weight bench have all become places for Norah to practice her moves. When she tried to do a pull up using an end table with a big lamp on it, we had to get LOUD to get her attention. Otherwise, that lamp was going to tumble and her head was probably going to be the thing that broke its fall.

But mostly, loud is not the way God works.

God is often quiet. He is in the song of the bird, the sneaky budding of plants in spring. Did you ever catch a leaf opening? God is quiet in his relentless movement towards justice and mercy for all. He is in the steady murmur of a new father as he rocks his wailing, loud baby to sleep.

God is quiet. God is showing us how to do strong.

Could you find some quiet today in your life? Just a few minutes is better than none.

See if conscious contact with God improves when you move into his quiet space of strength.

A Commitment to Happiness…

“Happiness is not out of reach.”

Krista O’Reilly David-Digue

The pandemic taught me so much about happiness. I discovered that it is not out of reach even if a lot of things that I thought brought me happiness are off limits. The pandemic required a level of paring down that most of us never dreamed would be required.

But in this, I found that happiness was still within reach.

For Pete and I we needed to recalibrate to grab hold of it because our longing for our “old” life was causing us a lot of anxiety. Anxiety was creating health problems and health problems were making us feel as old as our kids seem to believe we are - we were starting to feel our age.

We regrouped. We asked ourselves - what makes us happy that is attainable? We decided to believe that God is for us and with us and in us and that even a pandemic could not keep us from the love of God. We consciously, deliberately, asked ourselves - what do we need to practice that fits our chosen way of seeing?

We turned off the television and limited electronics. We started long daily walks. We found that eating home all the time allowed for better food choices. We gave ourselves permission to do more puzzles and read more books that in no way would improve our mind or body. Funny, mysterious, formulaic fiction. Whatever it took! I started taking online classes that filled me with the joy of learning. I followed both my personal interests and tried to up my ministerial skill sets - believing that one day the world would open back up and there would be plenty of fields in need of harvesting (Luke 10 if you are curious).

And we increased our conscious contact with people who love us. We had to ask ourselves, maybe for the first time in our lives - who loves US? We figured out how to play bridge online with our friends. We walk down the street and talk to our neighbors. We wave at strangers and smile even when we feel like crying because we know everyone needs a little encouragement.

Happiness is not out of reach if we are willing to take it on its terms - not as we would always have it, but where we can get it. The world is starting to open back up but Pete and I have made a promise to ourselves - we are not going to re-enter the world buried under the weight of obligation or duty. We are going to require of ourselves a commitment to happiness, the happiness that we have found in the most unlikely places.

Cultivating Conscious Contact with Others

As a way to connect, I also walk with friends or my husband in a meditative way. This walk may include conversation or we may commit to silence. Either way, when I take this kind of walk, I like to collect a stone along the way. I have a container I am filling up with these pebbles of connection. As I sit at my desk and try to work via zoom, this container reminds me that I am not alone or as disconnected as I sometimes feel.

What visible reminders do you have to help you focus on your intentions and your reality? Not the reality that others try to tell us is true; but the reality that is our lived experience.

Are we as isolated as the pandemic would have us believe? We have friends who we love to play bridge with, but that has not been possible during lockdown. But guess what? My creative friend found a way for us to play together online.

Can we find a way to increase our conscious contact with God and OTHERS?

No one called you lately? No worries, it turns out that our phones also have the capacity to dial out!

Today, however you find a way for quiet solitude with God, maybe leave that space and reach out to someone who may not be able to reach out to others right now - expecting nothing in return. I know in our insecurity it might feel a bit vulnerable to do so, do it anyway.

Healing Through Connection

I appreciate the stories people tell me through the various ways we are connecting during this pandemic season. I am not so thrilled about the content. It seems that there is more keeping us apart than a virus. Our different opinions are separating us, our political preferences are dividing us. Our interpretation of current events fills us with certainty but also creates a chasm between us and others. This is damaging to so much more than the economy or the political process. It is wrecking our mental health and battering our capacity for resilience.

Centering prayer and meditation causes our brain to light up in the same way that it does when we are experiencing a secure attachment relationship. This validates our hope that we will improve our conscious contact with God when we pray. We are making a connection!! If isolation is part of the disease of substance use disorder, then our current situation is creating a petri dish where use disorders will flourish. Connection is part of the treatment; it serves as good preventative medicine; it heals that which has been broken.

This privilege, to connect with God, invites God to do deep work within us. It is union with the divine. It helps cultivate lovely things like love and empathy and compassion.

I know that all the cool kids will enjoy their arguing and certainty. Thus is life.

But for the rest of us. Those who long for a life that is filled with love and joy and peace. This is a way we find it.

Today, see if you can spend a few minutes sitting in quiet awe of a God who shows up for you.

The Price of Ignoring Your Pain

We add to our suffering when we try to ignore our pain. Our compulsions are ways we work to avoid noticing. Meditation helps us notice. If we practice it regularly, we learn that our pain will not kill us and even diminishes once we give it respectful attention.

Avoiding acknowledging our pain CAN kill us.

My “prayer” journals may have served the purpose of off-loading my angst. There is nothing wrong about that practice. When we admit our feelings we reduce resentment and soothe anxiety. Mediation helps us notice the things we are avoiding.

But it also increases conscious contact with God, which provides a light to our path.

Yesterday I stood from my meditation time and made my way to my iphone. I texted one of my children, “I need quality time with you.” I realized I had an incomplete amends to make. Today, we had a lovely lunch. My heart feels lighter. I am tempted to weigh myself (but will resist that urge).

Without my practice, I would not have had the space to notice my wrongdoing. I would not have had the awareness of how this pained me. But without my conscious contact with God, I doubt I would have known what to rise up and DO about it.

This is the gift of the Step 11 - a call to prayer and meditation, an invitation to draw near to God so that he might draw nearer to us. Go have a good sit, if you are so inclined!