Mental Rest is Not Idleness

My grandparents were hardworking people who knew how to rest. They lacked all the distractions that we moderns have. My Papa could not watch all his favorite teams play every game - there was no NFL package for the football obsessed in his day. On a good day his radio would pick up his beloved Reds. It would be static-laden and no one was allowed to speak or make a noise while the game was on. That was fun.

They followed the rhythms of the sun and moon. In the summer they rose early because, without air conditioning in the south, you had to get those chores done before it got to blasted hot to breathe. They went to bed early because there was little to distract them and keep them up late. Plus, they were tired. Things were inconvenient and tiring - laundry had to go to the laundromat. Vegetables came from the garden not the Winn Dixie.

We have become out of sync. Our brains are on overload. We need to figure out how to rest more, daydream, and allow our brain to go into its default mode network. I know you are curious; what is this default mode network? It is when our mind is wandering that the default mode network goes into gear, assessing our present state and planning for the future. We're not aware of this work, but it is vital for wellness.

This is such new research that most of this function is a mystery; but what we do know is fabulous. People who toggle into default mode are more creative, socially skillful and happy. Mental rest is not idleness.

This was the gift of the pandemic for me. Grounded at home, I could work for an hour or two and then go fold clothes. I could go back to work and then run downstairs and throw food in the Insta Pot. I could work for an hour or two and do a workout. This is an ideal way to live, and I do not plan to change this post-pandemic. When we walk away from a task, we are recruiting our entire brain to keep working on the task while our body gets a good stretch in.

The enemy of default mode networking is boredom. Boredom is not our friend; our friend is a thing we will talk about tomorrow - active rest.

A New View of Letting Go

For a month’s worth of posts, I (Scott) am critiquing my own past blog posts. I’m viewing this as an experiment in being willing to admit when I’m wrong, change my mind, and to do so publicly.

When we speak of "letting go" we are, on the one hand, saying something about the release of control but, on the other hand, we're suggesting that we don't release control just for the sake of releasing control.  We "let go" so that we can see the world clearly.  It is only through proper orientation to that which is "ours to do" that we can live in the reality of what is and resist the temptation to ground ourselves in fantasy.  

Fantasy is what happens when we're utterly disoriented over what is "ours to do."  

Scott’s updated take as of 2021:

I wish I would speak more positively about you (us). I like the idea that we “let go” for a purpose, and not just to say that we let go. The phrase “letting go” is a nice little shorthand that describes the process of realizing how one thing in our lives is maybe getting in the way of our ability to maximize thriving. 

But, as of today, I see no reason to frame this in terms of “Fantasy v. Reality.”  It’s hard to let go of things. Often enough we have a long history with the things that we’re clinging so tightly to and this means it’s easy to be afraid of letting go. So I’ll close today by asking you a few questions instead of making more comments:

Are you holding on to some things that you wish you could let go of?

If you could let go of them, how would you do it?

When you let go of them, what else would you like to be doing with your time?