Perspective and Principles

Twenty three years ago, give or take, we began what is now known as Northstar Community founded upon a deep and abiding respect for the principles and practices of mutual aid societies like Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous. People did not prefer this. People from a faith background and years of church experience came and visited us in the early weeks and months and would often call me with feedback.

"Teresa, you may not have noticed this, but you do not have people stand up and greet each other at the start of your service. You know, this is how we do it in our church because it makes folks feel welcome." It also makes some people feel uncomfortable, especially folks trying to be anonymous.

"Teresa, I came over and you did not have a visitor card for me to fill out. You didn't take up an offering. Would you like me to bring you some cards and maybe get some ushers to volunteer to take up an offering?" I would not, because this is a pilot project and some of these folks are homeless and a few have warrants out for their arrest and no one wants to fill out a visitors card.

"Teresa, these 12-Steps you referred to today. They did not mention God once. What is this nonsense about a higher power? How can you expect me to be supportive of these efforts when those 12-Steps are so anti-God?" Well, actually, the writers of those twelve steps used the Bible to come up with the principles, particularly parts of Romans, 1 Corinthians and the entire book of James. I'm pretty sure the Oxford Group, who early on required baptism before attendance at an AA meeting would be pretty surprised to hear that we judged them so harshly.

Suffice it to say I received a lot of feedback that indicated that perhaps I was doing something wrong. None of this feedback was particularly stressful. Why? Because I was compelled by a strong inner voice that we were forging a path for the OTHER, not someone who had a faith background and years of church experience. I knew there were plenty of churches who had ushers and public greetings, but, as the scriptures say, "...the fields are ripe for the harvest, but the workers are few..."

There were people who did not feel comfortable with greetings and offering baskets and church buildings but they did feel at home in an AA meeting. Folks deserve at least one place in town that is set up for those who are interested in pursuing faith in an environment that respects their particular background. No one was wrong, people were just looking through different lens and coming to different conclusions. Eventually some folks find a church home and settle into it. Others stick around and some simply move on without leaving a forwarding address. Our beliefs and preferences can change. That's not a problem!

In any work we do, we have to make room in our mind, bodies, and spirit for feedback and the preferences of others. It will be easier if we have a strong sense of our own principles and preferences too. It will also help if we are not to stressed out - just in case people are more interested in telling us what they know rather than being curious about what we are learning - which can be frustrating.

If you are going to embark on an adventure, there will always be stressors. What are you doing to deal with your stressful situations and close your stress cycle?