Too Much Positivity?

"It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change." Charles Darwin

If I can be a Debbie Downer, there are other influencers who look like they take massive doses of puppy uppers. They reframe every negative into a positive, which I am sure is much appreciated by anyone who has spent too much time with me. But too much positivity can keep us from considering real obstacles and taking them into account. If we want to be helpful, we do have to consider the possibility that Pollyanna was not always correct.

Could this be you? Does your positivity ever cause others to feel as if you are not paying attention to details?

Be Reasonable

Resilient people are those who are able to see the world as it is, not as they wish it to be.  Looking through this lens, these realistic folks are able to make plans that are reasonable AND they carry these plans through to completion.  

Although flexibility is important, it is balanced with an ability to stay focused.  If we are going to follow through on our realistic goals, we need to learn how to be proactive, not reactive.

I realized at one point that I was feeling scattered (as opposed to flexible).  I might get to the end of a long day and have failed to accomplish even a modest task.  I, in an effort to be flexible and present for others, was constantly interrupting myself to answer emails and return phone calls.  This constant hopping from one technology to another left me drained.

I have strategies today to compensate for my tendency to flit from one crisis to the next.  Am I still flexible? I think so. But I’ve balanced that with a plan that includes the capacity to attend to and complete necessary tasks.  I’ve had to change the way I work in order to make this happen, which is also an example of being flexible and realistic!

How about you?  What do you need to reconsider in order to find balance and improve your resiliency?

Ideals versus realities

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It may be time to “let go and let God.”

Relationships are conditional.  Love can be unconditional – especially if we are standing close to God and receiving his love as a gift that we can pass along to others.  But relationships are conditional. 

People teach us that their best still puts us at risk at times and we have to distance ourselves for the sake of our own recovery journey.  Perhaps we come face-to-face with the cold, hard truth that our best has not been enough to create a healthy relationship with others.  Maybe our own behaviors cost us relationships too.

As we prepare for the new year, can we acknowledge this?  Maybe get some support to help us unearth what is ours to admit, acknowledge and repair?  This is always a good place to start and finish a daily examen.

May we find the support we need to continue our journey!  And may we be the support others need as they travel their respective roads to recovery too.