An Attitude of Acceptance

The scriptures remind us in so many ways how much God knows about us and how little we understand ourselves. Maybe today we could go to the source for our self-understanding. God, hear our cries!

While mindfulness encourages us to dis-identify with our thoughts, meditation does not. Meditators encourage us to simply observe, observe, observe. We are asked to observe our thoughts, feelings and body sensations. The only real caveat is that we are encouraged to have an attitude of acceptance and loving kindness toward ourselves. It is a simple way to practice surrender to God. I usually start my daily quiet time like this: “God, I am sitting here in acknowledgement of my reality: you are God and I am not.” Some days, that is all I need to say. Research studies are reporting that meditation is highly effective in the intervention of use disorders. It has also proven effective in the treatment of chronic pain, anxiety disorders and depression. Tiger spends an unhappy day thinking that his parents, friends, and school mates do not like him. How would this affect your mental health if you thought the world was out to get you? What difference would it make in your life if you looked through the lens of abundance rather than being shackled to the law of scarcity?

God makes everything come out right;

he puts victims back on their feet.

He showed Moses how he went about his work,

opened up his plans to all Israel.

God is sheer mercy and grace;

not easily angered, he’s rich in love.

He doesn’t endlessly nag and scold,

nor hold grudges forever.

He doesn’t treat us as our sins deserve,

nor pay us back in full for our wrongs.

As high as heaven is over the earth,

so strong is his love to those who fear him.

And as far as sunrise is from sunset,

he has separated us from our sins.

As parents feel for their children,

God feels for those who fear him.

He knows us inside and out,

keeps in mind that we’re made of mud.

Psalm 103:6-14, The Message

What is the Nature of Our World?

There is a story that goes around about how a reporter once asked Albert Einstein what he thought the most important question facing humanity. He said that the most fundamental question we ever ask ourselves is whether the universe is hostile or friendly.

The young woman I visited in the psych ward sees the world as a hostile place. The chairs are all hard plastic. The mattresses are thin and the blankets thinner. Lights are on 24/7. Someone is often creating a ruckus. One group tv is usually on mute but it hardly matters - who could agree on a shared interest anyway? When she reports her anxiety and asks for meds, they hand her an old battered plastic container of crayons and a piece of paper. The environment is inhospitable on a good day.

I, as a visitor, can agree with her assessment while noticing other details too. The nurse in charge is a friend of mine - a caring professional who loves her patients even when she has to tell them no. I notice also that for weeks before she landed here, this young woman was on the streets of Richmond, VA and it has been a damp, cold, rainy few weeks.

I look around and see the universe is trying to help her; she sees it as a place that disappoints, judges and does not understand her. Her desires rule her life even as they stand in contradiction to her hopes and dreams.

She is fighting for survival but this disease is only managed through the practice of surrender. I have to surrender to the reality that she will probably ditch this place in the morning and use drugs as quickly as possible. My recovery requires me to surrender to the world as it is, not as I wish it to be.

Suffering is not eliminated when we get to the twelfth step, but it is alleviated by this firmly held conviction that the world is a place where God still works alongside his children to make it a better place. In the meantime, we surrender and hope and pray that God will protect this precious one as she continues her journey. And we ask God to give us the strength to do his will which always includes having compassion for the suffering.

Letting Go- Surrender and Seeking

One thing we learn when we practice the eleventh step is that we can let go, surrender to and seek God’s will.

These are fine ideas but impossible to execute if the “god” of our understanding does not rescue little girls from sexual predators or abusive fathers. It is a challenge to trust a “god” when people chalk up death and disaster as “God’s will.”

This kind of God? How can we trust that? My friend Terri had to unlearn God stuff as did I. In the beginning of my recovery, the idea that God wanted to love me without condition was a radical concept for me. The practices of my early faith reflected an unspoken belief that God is hungry, angry, and distant. If I really looked closely at my rigid practices my relationship with God was more like my grandchildren’s relationship with the animals at the local petting zoo.

Feed him (God takes cash or credit cards these days) and don’t stand too close or you might get your fingers bit off. As we pray and meditate, our confusions and fears and ignorance will rise up and greet us on occasion. Instead of giving up, go looking for spiritual advisors who understand God’s character - gracious, merciful, loving and desirous of blessing and healing us.