This is Suffering

Anyone who has lived through it, or those who are now living through it, knows that caring about an addict is as complex and fraught and debilitating as addiction itself. At my worst, I even resented Nic because an addict, at least when high, has a momentary respite from his suffering. There is no similar relief for parents or children or husbands or wives or others who love them.

David Sheff, Beautiful Boy

How has your suffering exacerbated your mistakes?

What has it taught you and how might it have refined you?

If one shortcoming is fear - everyone who loves a person with a substance use disorder is plagued by it.

How does fear sometimes cause us to harm ourselves and/or others?

This is suffering. There is no need for judgment but plenty of opportunity to take a different path. Who can help you take a different path if you are suffering and find yourself living in ways that do not fit your intentions? As Mr. Rogers says, “Look for the helpers.” This saying was meant for preschoolers, and lately it has been used to bear more weight than I think Mr. Rogers could have imagined. But if we refuse to allow it to be a cliche, it still has value. We can look for someone to help us sort through our lives. That’s always a good thing.