The Issue with Comparisons

Years ago Pete and I were at a party and someone asked the crowd, “What is the most embarrassing thing you ever did?” And off to the races we all went, whipping out our most embarrassing moments in a crazy competition for most gut-wrenching moment of self-abasement.

Until this. (And it really helps if you watched the classic movie The Goonies to imagine this story in the voice of Chunk. If not, too bad for you cause it would be a lot funnier if you could!)

“One time in college, me and my friends went out to eat and that was a big deal because we were all really poor…..And we noticed that these people left their table with French friends and stuff still on their plate and we were really hungry so…..we went over and started eating what they left...(big pause)...But then they came back cause they were only going to the bathroom.”

Game over. This most embarrassing story has just won all the honors.

We cringed. We fell silent. Then we laughed and laughed and laughed.

What we really did was compare. And once we found the person with a story worse than any story of our own - that we would be willing to tell - whew! Sweet relief!

If you think you have harmed someone but hear a little voice in your head say, “But I didn’t intend to...and what about what so-and-so did? They are much worse than me...” that’s normal but it’s also time to get some support and accountability to help you sort through your harming ways.